Misconstrued Thoughts

Is your boyfriend cute?

Anonymous

This is us, so you tell me:

A day in my life:

my partner: Mmmh, I like those new panties you have on.
me: Thanks, they're stripey.
my partner: Baby, no they're not. They have poka dots.
me: Sorry, I was thinking about cats.

cosmo tip #151

expertcosmotips:

want to make a good impression on that cute guy at the park? step in dog poo

I put my hand in dog shit at the park when we first started dating and my goofy Bradley thought it was HILARIOUS.

This is actually not a bad tip for a scatological man.